We often only experience moments in labour that we are not prepared for and learn afterwards that a ‘normal’ spontaneous birth has many different normalities. We are frightened when our baby’s heartbeat drops, it can be stressful when the birth process suddenly stops and it is not in our power to actively control it. The moment when the head stretches us until we can hardly believe it, can be so overwhelming. We might even feel how our child’s head ‘hooks’ onto our pelvic bone and suddenly we learn what an incredibly narrow path it is and how literally the way can be blocked. And then we do find a way, we stretch so far, perhaps we are shocked that something inside us tears, but that doesn’t have to have serious consequences. Only at that moment it can completely overwhelm us and then the birth moves on and there is no time to pause, to perceive, to land. However, you have this time with me and all the moments that want to be honoured and realised again are allowed to be.
Frightening birth moments
Our idea of a birth is rarely based on real experience. Few women have been able to accompany friends in labour or have had a really deep exchange with women giving birth, and even if they have, every birth is different and every woman experiences her birth differently.